I used to sometimes forget this and I know that others do, too. Looking at yourself in a way that you think others may see you or basing your self-worth on another’s judgment of you takes so much from what you are. It takes away that sacred power that we all have within us and puts it in the hands of someone else.
If no one told you you’re intelligent or good-looking, or whatever else, would you still think you’re intelligent or good-looking? Or would you not think of yourself as someone with those qualities, because no one said it to you? Sadly enough, for many people, the answer here, whether they realise it or not, is no. Why do you give the power to other people to tell you what to believe about yourself? Don’t get me wrong, people complimenting you is great and I for one, am somebody that appreciates it very much. Sure, it does boost your confidence. But placing too much importance on other people’s opinion of you is not healthy at all. This applies whether what they think of you is positive or negative. First and foremost, the basis of your confidence lies within YOU and what YOU think of yourself. This way, people’s approval and compliments towards you is simply a bonus.
There’s a quote that I like that kind of pertains to what I’m saying:
“They [people] know a few facts about you, and they piece you together in a way that makes sense to them. And if you don’t know yourself very well, you might even believe that they are right. But the truth is, that isn’t you. That isn’t you at all.” – Leila Sales
Don’t allow others to mould you into their perception of you. You are the only one that truly knows yourself and all your qualities and capabilities. You are your own exclusive sculptor. Withhold that power.